This week I cracked open a brand new notebook and started writing a few notes which will hopefully grow into my second novel.
I’ve had the beginnings of an idea for a while and kept it on Gas Mark 5 in the back of my mind but thought I should concretely start writing as soon as my New Year hangover subsides.
I’m determined that this second one will benefit from the knowledge and confidence that I’ve been through this process already, mainly, I want to finish the first draft much quicker, hopefully by the end of 2010.
I watched Question Time the other night, the one with the racist nut on it and was struck by a comment from one of the questioners in the audience who seemed to have some kind of beef with some of the language being used.
You can see her full comment for yourself here on YouTube, I’ve linked to the specific bit in the video.
But here’s the text of the bit I’m referring to…
The parties must listen because, one of the things, I am sitting here and every time Jack Straw or somebody or one of the panel says ‘Afro-Caribbean’, I am cringing…Afri-CAN Ca-RIB-bean!
Talk about grammar Nazis! I missed the memo where ‘Afro-Caribbean’ was now an offensive term.
I got my first Asimov magazine and in it there is a novella and a couple novelettes. Not knowing the difference between all these varieties I fired up the old searching fingers and consulted the great internet for some answers.
Dearest Google, what the hell is the difference between a novel, novella, novelette and short story?
Of course Wikipedia came back with a page that nailed the answer by using the definitions as set by the Nebula Awards, which are;
- Novel = a work of 40,000 words or more.
- Novella = between 17,500 and 40,000 words.
- Novelette = between 7,500 and 17,499 words.
- Short Story = under 7,500 words.
So it’s strictly down to word count…or how arsed a writer can be with their idea…I jest!
Are there any other literary forms? Surely a mammoth text of 200,000 words deserves its own category?
Just thought, Flash Fiction is another one. Accordingly, Wikipedia says there is no defined length but normally less than 1,000 words.
Thinking about it, I think 5 seperate forms is enough otherwise it’ll get stupid with every 1,000 words constituting a change of definition for your work.
“What do you think of the novel?”
“Well, first things first, technically it’s a ‘Flash Novella Postcard’.”
“Oh…is that good?”
“O’yes, it’s this year’s ‘Nanonovelette Vignette’.”
“Oh.”
I recently read a good short story in the July/August edition of Interzone Magazine called ‘Silence and Roses’ by Suzanne Palmer but it’s not online anywhere for you to read it. So if you can’t buy that edition of the magazine then visit her website here just to say hello.
Instead, here’s a brilliant short story from the master of robots. I first read it a couple of years ago and it blew my small, little mind to bits. Don’t read the last bit…whatever you do, don’t read the end first.
Apparently it was his favourite short story.
Read it here – ‘The Last Question’ by Isaac Asimov.
There’s been much made about James Murdoch’s speech for the MacTaggart lecture at the Edinburgh TV festival which has led to a #welovethenhs style campaign on Twitter – #welovethebbc – and Robert Peston losing his rag so I can’t add much about James Murdoch blatantly trying to give Sky an easier ride into mindnumbing, advertising driven TV hell.
He consistently calls the BBC ‘state-sponsored’ which may partly be true in that they do receive government funds but only a small percentage of total revenue, the licence fee funds the majority of the BBC (about 75%). That means; you, me and all the other licence fee payers fund it, not the government. Saying it’s state-sponsored makes you think it’s a distance relative of North Korean TV. It’s not directly linked to the government, The BBC Trust is the middle man between The BBC and the UK government and UK licence fee payers.
He also said a much greater deregulated media industry without The BBC is giving consumers what they want. A few years back James Murdoch said;
I’ve nearly finished the 4th draft of my novel ‘Railroaded’, in it a character has a touch of the runs or ‘diarrhea’. Now my middle school spelling tests have deserted me and I spelt it so badly that the Word spell check had no idea what word I was trying to spell so couldn’t offer me the correct version.
I went online to search out the correct spelling and found it here at Dictionary.com.
diarrhea
–noun Pathology. an intestinal disorder characterized by abnormal frequency and fluidity of fecal evacuations.
I just love the explanation, especially the last bit; fecal evacuations.
Usually dictionary definitions offer such plain, logical descriptions without evoking any emotion or human connection to the word in hand.
This definition not only gives you the meaning but brings you back to a time when you gripped the porcelain throne, straining for one last evacuation hoping it was the last as your ringer couldn’t take anymore.
I’m sure Samuel Johnson would be satisfied with this great definition for an English word. I know I am.
In a word; domain squatting twats.
That’s 3 words but you get my meaning. When looking for a domain name I obviously checked out www.benellis.com first which is already very capably occupied by Ben Ellis, film director. Top marks to that esteemed member of the Ben Ellis community.
My next visit was www.benellis.co.uk which has been registered and is an empty wasteland on the internet, not only that but an embarassing gap in the Ben Ellis canon. I sent a letter to the registrants address but received nothing back. Philistines.
With the two main options unavailable I had to revise some of my domain purchasing pet hates, most notably; I hate hyphens and I refuse to buy anything other than .com’s or co.uk’s.
This could be hosted on www.benellis.mobi or www.benellis.me.uk but I have more class than to stoop down to that level of desperation.
I would have relented on the hyphens for www.ben-ellis.com or www.ben-ellis.co.uk but they’re being violated by domain squatting twats. May those poor souls be rehabiliated and let back into the Ben Ellis community soon.
I don’t speak leet but using numbers as letters is an idea to get some more domain name options, especially if you’re not an established entity and have the freedom to wiggle about and use some artistic licence. I also liked the idea of using numbers to help make an interesting logo for the site.
I thought about using ’1′ for the ‘i’ but the two ‘e’s as ’3′s is enough.
I actually really like www.b3n3llis.com now. Even if benellis.co.uk became available, I’d refuse it and let some other pillar of the Ben Ellis world grab it and establish it as the tower of BenEllisdom it is so surely destined to become.
So, that’s about the the long and the short of it. Not terribly interesting or groundbreaking, merely relevant.
Let’s get this thing over with shall we?
The creation of this blog is to serve as a dumping ground for any writing that I do and anything that stems from it. At the moment that just consists of this blog, which if you think about it too hard sends you into an infinite downward spiral.
I’m writing this even before I’ve done the blog design, layout or worked out what kind of stuff I’ll put up here. I guess that’ll evolve over time. I have done some writing though. There’s a handful of short stories and a novel.
The novel is the main reason for this blog.
The reason came from listening to this writing podcast I stumbled across a few months earlier – The Writing Show – in particular this episode – What Do Publishers Want from Query Letters and Proposals? Jennifer Silva Redmond is an editor and in the interview (about 20 minutes in) she says that a writer needs to not only sell their story but also themselves. Any positive points you can toss into the mix is a bonus and a way to stand apart from all the other wannabes. One such tip is to not be a know-it-all arsehole. Another one is to write a blog.
